Saturday, September 7, 2013

Thoughts About Adoption Messages In Children's Clothing

We're spending this time packing, watching incredibly stupid horse movies checked out from the library (such a disappointment!), trying not to fret over some date changes in our this-house closing that would affect our that-house closing. 

And I've read three books.  For fun.
And I've been crocheting again.

Kind of helps when you have no furniture in the house except for a card table and chairs and two semi-uncomfortable used-to-be-doctor's-office-pleather-chairs. 

That, and we've been playing a restaurant's version of Bejeweled in attempts to get free food for the next year. 
Class acts, I tell you.

Tonight, I was folding some laundry, and I came across a onesie of Creedence's. 

It has a little fish on the front, and it says "This one's a keeper."
We live the kind of privileged life where I don't know if Creedence has ever actually worn the onesie or if it's just been shuffled from diaper bag to diaper bag.

But tonight, for whatever reason, I couldn't stop thinking of some other things about that onesie.  How must birth mothers and adoptees in the United States feel about the trite message displayed on that garment?  (And on apparently many onesies; I was lazily searching for an image of the onesie on google, and there are at least 18 types of "keeper" messages on onesies.)

When I (or whoever) bought that garment, we obviously weren't thinking of the back message of a fishing story: A) this one meets all of the requirements and is satisfying to me, appropriate weight etc., so I won't throw him back in the pond B) Some fish don't meet those requirements and aren't worth keeping.  (And disturbingly C: I just like to reel fish in for the fun of it so I can throw them back.)

When I think of it from an adoption perspective, it's horrifying.  To display a shirt on your child that says A) this baby meets my requirements and satisfies me, I think I'll keep him and B) Some babies aren't worth keeping, is utterly revolting.

Sigh.  I know that the person who designed the onesie designed it with a view of the parental-child relationship---an affirmation that "yes, you, my special child, are valued." 

If only, it didn't have a predator and prey relationship to go along with the lunch and eater mentality.

If I could give a facebook-status-type summary to this whole post, it would be: Heather is feeling disillusioned with children's clothing. 

How about you?  Have you ever seen any kids' clothing that looked cute initially and only revealed it's tasteless side later on?


  1. the 50% mommy, 50% daddy onesies always make me sigh a little.

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